


Be Still My "Beating" Heart

by Dawne-Sharlotte (bmsaangel16)



Category: Soul Eater
Genre: Drama, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Physical Abuse, Romance, Verbal Abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-09-03
Updated: 2013-11-06
Packaged: 2017-12-25 11:24:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 15,187
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/952515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bmsaangel16/pseuds/Dawne-Sharlotte
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Maka and Blackstar have been dating for a year. How will Soul react when the relationship doesn't go well? Rated T for mild violence. MakaxBlackstar will straighten out to SoulxMaka. AU. I don't own Soul eater :(</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

We had known each other for years and yet no one had a clue what was happening. I'd known them since high school. Blackstar and Maka were childhood friends. Our entire group of friends thought they were the perfect odd couple. Maka was his complete opposite, the anti-Blackstar. He was loud, obnoxious, and self-centered. She was quiet, shy, and self-sacrificing. Maka was an amazing woman to put up with Blackstar. I would have dated her myself if Blackstar hadn't beaten me to it last year. She wasn't gorgeous, but she was definitely cute, innocent-like even. Her smile could light up a room.

We didn't have a clue how messed up their relationship was until she showed up at my apartment with a black eye and busted lip. At first Maka would have the occasional odd bruise, which Blackstar would blame on her self-defense class. The bruises began to increase in number and her other injuries started to get worse. At one point, I had to tape up a couple of her broken ribs.

On this particular day, it was storming pretty hard and I was watching a movie when I heard a timid knock at the door. I opened the door and tried not to openly flinch at the sight before me. There was Maka, soaking wet from the rain, with a swollen left cheek, countless bruises, and another black eye. Her eyes were red from the tears she'd cried on her way to my apartment.

"Do you mind if I crash here for a few hours?" She was shivering from cold as well as fear.

"Of course. You know you don't have to ask. That's why I gave you a key."

She nodded as she came in. I went and got her a towel.

"The extra clothes you brought are in the closet in the spare bedroom."

"Thank you, Soul."

After showering and changing, she came and sat next to me on the couch.

"That cheek could use some ice, as well as that eye."

She touched her cheek gingerly. "Is it that bad?"

"Well it's about the size of a lemon."

Maka pulled an ice pack out of the freezer and winced as she held it to her cheek.

"What set him off this time?"

"I was supposed to hang out with Tsubaki. Blackstar didn't want me to go. I told him that I could wherever I wanted. He snapped at started throwing things at me."

"Look, I know he is my friend, but you are too. If you need me to step in I will do whatever I can to help."

She shook her head. "I don't want to come between you guys."

"That's a stupid reason."

"Don't worry Soul. I plan on leaving him. I've had my stuffed packed for a couple of days."

"Where are you going to stay?"

"Kid offered to let me stay at his place for a few days"

I felt my heart break a little. I was a little jealous that she had asked for Kid's help instead of mine.

I tucked a loose hair behind her ear. "You know I'm here if you need anything."

She gave me a small smile. "You've done so much already. I couldn't possibly ask you to do any more."

She fell asleep while watching TV soon after. I carried her to the guest bedroom, where she slept peacefully for the next few hours. This was beginning to become a routine and it frustrated me. Just because Blackstar was my closest friend didn't mean I condoned what he had done to Maka. I would have stepped in long ago but I knew he would just take out his anger on her. So, we fell into this depressing pattern of Maka hiding out in my apartment until Blackstar cooled down.  
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

My phone rang. It was Tsubaki. She was probably looking for Maka. All of our friends knew if they couldn't get a hold of Maka, they could call me. Well, everyone knew except Blackstar.

"Hey Tsubaki."

"Hey Soul. Have you heard anything from Maka? We were supposed to go shopping this afternoon, but she isn't answering her phone."

"Yeah, she's here. Blackstar flew of the handle again."

Tsubaki sighed. "There must be something we can do to stop this."

"What do you suggest? He broke two of her ribs the last time we got involved. The last thing I want is for her to get hurt because of us."

"You really love her don't you?"

"What's not to love? I don't understand how he can treat her that way."

My other line beeped in. "Speak of the devil. I gotta go. Blackstar is on the other line. I'll tell Maka to call you when she wakes up."

"Thanks Soul."  
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

I steeled myself for the conversation with Blackstar. "Hello?"

"Soul! What's up man?"

I lowered the volume on the phone. "Nothing much, just watching some TV."

"Cool. Not much else to do with this weather. Anyway, Maka and I had a little fight earlier and she got all emotional and left without her phone. The weather is pretty bad, so I was thinking that maybe she stopped by your apartment. The others haven't seen or heard from her."

There was no way I was telling him that Maka was here, not if I valued her life. "Nope. I haven't heard from her at all today. I'm sure she'll be back soon. There are only so many places she can go."

"I hope you're right. I'll talk to you later."  
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

I looked up as I hung up the phone and saw Maka standing in the doorway. She looked so lost. She had lost that air of certainty she always had. She used to be confident, headstrong, and stubborn to a fault if you got to know her. The hollow look that graced her green eyes frightened me. In a year, my best friend had broken her spirit. It was in that moment, that I decided to throw all caution to the wind. I vowed to get her away from Blackstar and to protect her for as long as she needed.

"Was that Blackstar?"

"Yeah. Tsubaki called as well."

She nodded slightly. "I'll call her when I get back home."

"You're going back tonight? You can't be serious."

"We both know it will be worse if I don't go."

"Maka, why do you keep going back to him? He almost put you in the hospital once. Do you actually want to go next time?"

My brain barely noticed that she was flinching. The next words she spoke were so quiet that I had to strain to hear them

"If I don't make him mad, he's actually a good boyfriend."

I'm pretty sure my disbelief was written across my face. "Oh really? So tell me, what is it exactly that you do that makes Blackstar so angry? Since when is speaking your mind or hanging out with your other friends so bad that he feels he can hit you for it?"

My breathing was ragged. That's when I noticed that I had been on the verge of yelling. Tears started to roll down her cheeks. This was new territory. I'd never seen her cry before. I'd seen her angry, disappointed, happy, and even really sad. But she'd never cried before.

"I'm really sorry. It's not my place to say anything, but, none of this is your fault. No one deserves this, especially you. I just don't like seeing you hurt."

I pulled her into a hug and we stayed like that for a few minutes, until she started giggling.

"I've known you for years and you've never been that sappy. You better be careful or you'll ruin your cool persona."

"I'm not too worried about it."

"You should be. I might tell all of our friends how uncool you can be."

I put a finger under her chin and tilted her face up to mine. "As I said, I'm not worried about it at the moment."

I don't know what came over me but I kissed her. I could sense her shock at first, and then she relaxed into the kiss.

1.) I'm finally kissing the girl I've had a crush on for year.  
2.) She's my best friend's girlfriend.  
3.) Blackstar will kill me if he finds out.

A knock on my front door killed any thoughts I might have had of the kiss going any further.

"Who is it?"

"It's Blackstar."

I looked behind me to tell Maka to hide. It wouldn't be good for Blackstar to find her here. She was already out of sight. I opened the door and Blackstar pushed pass me.

"She's still not back yet." He was frantically pacing.

"I'm sure she'll be back soon."

"Maka has never been gone this long after a fight. What if something terrible has happened to her?"

"You mean something worse than you?"

His eyes widened slightly. "What are you talking about Soul?"

"I'm talking about a year's worse of black eyes, bruises, and broken ribs."

"How many times do I have to tell you? She gets them from her self-defense class!"

"We both know that she is not in a self-defense class."

"I can't believe that you think I would lay a hand on Maka!" Blackstar's face was flushed with rage.

"I can't believe you think we are all too dumb to notice." I spoke evenly.

"Fine. I admit it. I've lost control a few times. She's fine though. Since when is Maka's well being a concern of yours anyway?"

"A black eye doesn't fall under the category of fine and to answer your other question. She is my friend just as much as you. So it would make sense if I were concerned about her."

Blackstar's eyes roamed the room until something by the couch caught his eye. I followed his gaze. "Why are Maka's shoes here?"

I tried to keep my expression blank.

"These are the ones she had on when she left the house. Has she been here the whole time?"

This was not going well.

"Where is she?"

"I'm not telling you anything until you calm down."

Blackstar scoffed. "I can't believe you would pull this crap. You've wanted her for years and you were always jealous that I landed her instead of you. Did you think you could see her behind my back and I wouldn't figure it out?"

I thought about the kiss Maka and I shared before Blackstar got here. Was I really that underhanded? I didn't think so. I just didn't want to see her sad anymore.

"Blackstar do you hear yourself? You sound ridiculous. You are my best friend. I would never ruin your relationship or our friendship for my personal gain. I'm worried about both you. Maka could get seriously hurt when you go on these rampages. I don't want you to do something you might regret later."

"Screw you. You are dead to me. You can tell Maka that she has one hour to get her scrawny behind home or she will learn what real pain feels like."

"She isn't going anywhere near you."

"Soul, I'm only gonna say this one time. Stay out of her business because it doesn't concern you. You will regret it if you don't!" He stormed out of the apartment and slammed the door behind him.


	2. Chapter 2

I felt like a coward hiding in Soul's room. I suppose my self-preservation instinct kicked in. The whole time I was hiding, all I could think about was that kiss. It was no secret that Soul had feelings for me but I didn't expect for him to actually act on them. I didn't expect to be disappointed when Blackstar interrupted us either. If Blackstar treated me like Soul did, I wouldn't be in this mess. Scratch that. If I had picked Soul in the first place, I wouldn't be in this mess.

Hearing Blackstar yell at Soul made me jump. "Screw you. You are dead to me. You can tell Maka that she has one hour to get her scrawny behind home or she will learn what real pain feels like." "She isn't going anywhere near you." "Soul, I'm only gonna say this one time. Stay out of her business because it doesn't concern you. You will regret it if you don't!"

I heard the door slam, but fear rooted me to the floor in the middle of the room. I didn't want to imagine the horrors that awaited me at home.

***

The door of the room opened and Soul walked in. At that moment all I wanted was for Soul to put his arms around me and tell me that everything was going to be okay. Everything was starting to get to me. The room was shaking.

"Maka. Maka! Are you ok? Look at me."

My eyes slowly found his deep crimson ones. His eyes had a grounding effect on me and my senses began to recover from the overwhelming fear that gripped me. My ears were assaulted by the sounds of strangled sobs. I realized that the sounds were coming from me and the room wasn't shaking, I was. Soul pulled me into his chest and held me tightly. My fingers clawed at his shirt as I held onto him for dear life. When I finally pulled myself together, I felt like an idiot.

I'd let Blackstar break me and I was expecting Soul to put me back together again. I had to cut my dependency on both of them. This was my problem and I shouldn't have involved Soul. I dragged myself out of his grasp and started to gather my things. It was time to face Blackstar head on.

"What are you doing?"

I didn't look at him because I couldn't bear to see the look in his eyes. So I was surprised when he seized my wrists and turned me to face him.

"You can't seriously be thinking of going back? Did you not hear what said?"

"I heard him, but you cannot fight this battle for me! You can't involve yourself anymore."

It was true that I didn't want to involve him any further; however, I also didn't want Blackstar to target him as well. The further I got from Soul, the better it would be for both of us in the long run.

"I wouldn't dare tell you where you can or can't go, but surely you know what a bad idea this is." He whispered.

"I have to end this. I can't live in fear anymore and I can't expect you to keep protecting me."

I could see the hurt, fear, and despair in his eyes. He released his hold on my wrists and sighed in defeat. I kissed him on the cheek.

"When this is all over, maybe we can give us a try."

His expression was blank. He didn't even acknowledge my last statement and I was a little miffed about it.

"At least let me drive you over there. It's late and you don't need to be walking around the city at this time of night."

I nodded.

****

We excited his apartment and went downstairs to his bike. He handed me a helmet and I quickly snapped it into place. I got on the motorcycle behind him. I wrapped my arms tightly around Soul's waist.

When we arrived at the apartment that I shared with Blackstar, my resolve wavered. It didn't help that the lights were on. That meant that he was waiting for me to walk through that door. I got off the bike and handed the helmet to Soul. My fingers started to tremble as he took it. Soul took my small hands in his larger ones, an effort to calm the trembling. I met his gaze. There was so much tenderness and emotion in his ruby eyes that I almost cried.

"Are you sure about this?" His deep voice was as smooth as velvet. I knew if I stayed any longer, Soul would be able to talk me out of going up there.

"Yes, I'm sure." He kissed the insides of both of my wrists. A shiver shot up my spine.

"If you need anything, just say the word."

He let my hands go and I headed to my apartment.

***

My hands shook uncontrollably as I tried to unlock the door. I finally got the door open and stepped inside.

"I'm home."

I looked around and saw Blackstar standing by the window. He turned as I heard Soul's bike drive off. The look in Blackstar's eyes was cold as ice. Fear started to grip me.

"Congratulations, you made it within the hour." He was too calm.

My breathing quickened as he closed the space between us. "Are you seeing Soul behind my back?"

"I'm not seeing him romantically if that's what you mean." He pushed me against the wall, his face inches from mine.

"Don't be a smartass Maka. I don't find it attractive."

"Are you telling me that I can't hand out with my friends without your permission? You don't own me, Blackstar?"

He backhanded me and all I saw was stars. "Like hell I don't own you. Don't forget you are MY girlfriend which means you belong to me."

I laughed. "You can't own me because this thing that you have the audacity to call a relationship is over."

His eyes widened. The last thing I felt was pain before everything went black.


	3. Chapter 3

I didn't want to let Maka go anywhere near Blackstar, but she was determined to do everything on her own. My mind kept going back to the terrified look in her emerald eyes before she left. I sat outside for a few minutes. When nothing suspicious happened, I left. Something in me screamed that I needed to go back, even though I knew my interference might make it worse for Maka. I couldn't shake the feeling that I might never see her again if I didn't go back. I made a u-turn and sped back to her apartment.

When I got back everything looked the same. I wasn't sure what I expected. I didn't see any signs that suggested that Maka was in any danger. Then I heard it. A scream that stopped my heart, that caused my world to crash down around me. I'd only heard her scream like that on one other occasion, but I didn't have time to dwell on that.

***

I ran up the stairs, taking them two at a time. The door of the apartment was slightly open. I slowly pushed it open, revealing the chaos in front of me. The apartment looked like it had been ransacked. The couch and the table were turned over, there was a broken lamp in the corner, and the curtains were partially torn down. I also noticed a torn picture of me, Maka, and Blackstar before the two started dating.

As I ventured farther, I began to see books strewn all over the floor. Maka must have thrown them in self defense. A streak of blood caught my eye and my heart lodged in my throat. I thought I was too late until I heard sounds of whimpering. There was a dull thud followed by a weak squeal from Maka. I crept towards the room the sounds were emanating from. The door was partially ajar. I saw her in the corner of the room, but I couldn't see Blackstar. Maka had angry purple splotches growing on her skin and her blonde hair was matted with blood. I hated seeing her like that. It made my blood boil with anger. Blackstar would be lucky if I didn't kill him for he'd done to her.

I shifted my weight and the floor under me creaked. The door flew open. At first, my vision could only register Blackstar's blue hair.

"What are you doing here?" he spat out.

"Blackstar I just want to talk."

"I have nothing to say to you. You are dead to me, remember?"

Maka's tremulous voice spoke. "Soul you shouldn't be here."

"I told you to be quiet. Maybe if you hadn't been cheating on me with my best friend, you wouldn't be in this situation." He said everything very calmly, almost as if he were making small talk.

"Look Blackstar, I don't know where you got the idea that Maka and I were seeing each other, but it's not true."

"I saw you two."

"What are you talking about?"

I tried to figure everything out. Maka and I were really good about not being in compromising situations. With the exception of that kiss earlier in the night, neither of us ever made a move on the other. Maka gasped. "The café." "That would be correct. You aren't as dumb as you pretend to be sometimes." I was still confused. Then the memory came flooding back.

***

I'd run into Maka on my way to Kid's house. She was supposed to meet Blackstar at a coffee shop a few blocks away. I offered to walk her since I was going in the same direction. When we were about halfway there it started to rain. I took off my jacket and held it over our heads. We ran the rest of the way. By the time we got to the coffee shop, we were drenched, out of breath, and laughing. I hung around and chatted with her for a few minutes. Then I gave her a hug and left. The last part was a bit fuzzy, but I was pretty sure that was what happened. Maka told me later that Blackstar never showed up.

***

I couldn't figure out why Blackstar was acting the way he was, plus that was six months ago. Six months. That's when the bruises began appearing on Maka. It was amazing I hadn't figured out before now. However, I couldn't form one plausible scenario that would convince him that Maka was cheating on him with me.

"Blackstar, I'm not sure what you thought you saw, but we are just friends." I know we can work this out if we just…."

Blackstar's calm demeanor finally broke. "Stop talking! Both of you!"

He pointed a gun at Maka. "Let me make something clear. Maka, you are not to see Soul ever again without my knowledge. Soul, we are no longer friends. You kissed my girlfriend and broke whatever trust I had in you six months ago."

"Wait I never…"

It hit me. I had kissed her before tonight. I kissed her before I left her in that coffee shop six months ago. She was being hurt because of me.

"I understand why you are upset but that's no reason for you to beat Maka or point a gun at her. Why didn't you just talk to me? You took everything out on her. Why?"

Blackstar shifted so the gun was pointed at me. "I don't have to explain myself to you. Do you feel better now that the gun is pointed at you?"

I smirked. If he was going to play this game, I would too, as long as it took his attention off Maka.

"Marginally. If pointing a gun at me makes you feel better, then so be it."

"Actually pulling the trigger would make me feel better."

"Well at least you aren't picking on someone weaker than you."

Blackstar scoffed. "You aren't my equal when it comes to strength. I could snap your neck like a tooth pick."

"That may be true, however, I know much more about that gun you are holding than you do. Including how to disarm you."

I noticed Maka slowly inching towards the door. She could get out unnoticed if I could keep Blackstar's attention on me.

"Come on man, you don't want to shoot me. All of this is just a misunderstanding."

"A misunderstanding? Let me guess, you tripped and Maka's lips caught yours. You didn't mean to kiss her right? Understand this; you better stay away from me and my girlfriend. As a matter of fact, don't talk to her. If you even look in her general direction, I will end you."

Maka stiffened. "Wait just a minute Blackstar. I told you, our relationship is over. You do not dictate who I talk to or spend time with."

I was glad that Maka stood up for herself, but it would have been better if she hadn't done it at that moment. Blackstar pointed the gun at Maka and cocked it. I tackled him to the floor. The gun went off as it left his hand and I felt a tug at my chest. I managed to get him in a choke hold and he eventually passed out. I got up and looked around for Maka. I needed to get her out of the apartment before Blackstar woke up. She was crouched on the floor with her hands over her head. I rushed to her side.

"Maka are you okay?"

She looked at me with wide eyes. "Oh god Soul, you're bleeding. We should call an ambulance."

I looked down at my yellow shirt. There was a widening red spot in the chest area. "We'll worry about it once we get you out of here."

"Soul, this is serious."

"Maka, I swear we will go straight to the hospital, but I would rather not be here when Blackstar regains consciousness."

I didn't feel and pain from the wound or dizziness from blood loss. I figured I was still hyped up on adrenaline.

***

The fact that we made it to the hospital in one piece was a miracle because I don't remember how we got there. My only thought was to get Maka as far away from Blackstar as possible.

The minute we walked into the emergency room, I collapsed.


	4. Chapter 4

Everything happened so fast. There were so many people and they moved so fast all I could see were blurs. All I remember was the sound of my own voice when Soul collapsed.

"Somebody please help us! He's been shot!"

There were so many doctors and nurses huddled around Soul that I couldn't see what they were doing to him. His prone form was loaded onto a gurney and wheeled away. I tried to follow, but a nurse grabbed my arm.

"Ma'am are you hurt?"

The nurse prodded at my hairline. I winced, but that paled in comparison to what Soul was going through.

"We are going to do our best to help your friend. In the meantime, we need to get you examined. That gash on your head may need stitches."

I craned my neck, trying to see where they had taken Soul as the nurse led me to an examination room. The wait for the doctor seemed to go on forever. My eyelids started to get heavy. A nap didn't sound so bad. It had been a very trying day.

"Ma'am, I'm afraid I can't let you sleep. It looks like you've had some head trauma." A kind, yet unfamiliar voice roused me from my floating consciousness.

"Can you tell me your name?"

"It's Maka. Maka Albarn."

"What happened to you and the young man that came in with you?"

I couldn't figure out what to say. I didn't want the police looking for Blackstar, at least not yet. I wanted to get everything straightened out with him. The best course of action was to avoid the question all together. Besides, I still didn't know how Soul was doing.

"Is Soul going to be alright?"

"Right now he's still in surgery."

The tears started to sting my eyes. The doctor shook his head and sighed.

"I want to run a couple of tests on you. I'm almost positive that you have a concussion and that cut on your head needs stitches. I also want to make sure you don't have any internal bleeding."

I nodded.

"Do you have anyone that we can contact?"

"No."

"I see. A nurse will be here shortly to take you to have those tests done."

* * *

The doctor left and I pulled out my phone that I managed to grab before we left my apartment. I searched through my contacts until I found the one I was looking for and hit the call button.

"Hello?"

"Hi Wes, its Maka."

"This is an unexpected surprise. How are you?"

I wasn't sure how long I could maintain my composure, so I needed to make this quick.

"Not so good. It's about Soul." My voice cracked when I said his name.

"What happened? Is he alright?"

"Soul was shot tonight. I don't know how he is yet. The doctor said he was still in surgery."

"I'm sure he'll pull through just fine. Soul is a fighter." Wes' voice was strained.

"You should be here Wes. He is your little brother."

"Soul told us long ago that he didn't want anything to do with us. We are his family and he just left. Our mother was devastated. He deserted us."

"Soul has told me very little about what happened before he left, but you cannot desert him now."

Tears began to slide down my cheeks.

"Maka, I appreciate you letting me know what happened, however, I can't be there. I trust that you will keep me updated on his recovery."

"But Wes…" The line died.

* * *

A nurse came in with a wheelchair.

"Maka Albarn?"

"Yes."

She smiled kindly at me. "We are going to do an x-ray and a MRI. If both of those come back clean, you'll be free to go."

Both tests went pretty quickly and I found myself back in the examination room waiting for the doctor again. The doctor entered the room followed by two police officers. I'm pretty sure I looked really confused. The doctor spoke.

"Maka, first of all, you have a concussion and that gash on your head will need about five or six stitched. I want to keep you here overnight for observation. Secondly, your x-rays are very concerning to me. You have quite a few healed breaks. The ones that are most alarming are the breaks in your ribs. You currently have hairline fractures in three of your ribs. All of them have been completely broken at least twice. All of them look fairly recent, a couple of months apart. You are actually still healing from some of them. All of this is consistent with a pattern of extreme physical abuse."

"Okay."

The doctor turned and made quiet conversation with the two officers. I wasn't sure what they wanted me to say or do. I continued to stare at the three of them in silence. One of the officers was taller than the other two men. He had light brown hair and hazel eyes. His name tag stated that he was Officer James. He broke away from the others and sat down in front of me.

"The hospital is obligated by law to report all gun shot wounds to the police."

I was still lost. "This has something to do with Soul?"

The brown-haired man studied me intently. "Did you shoot him because he was abusing you?"

"Soul has never hit me and I don't even know how to shoot a gun!"

"You don't have to protect him. I'm sure the judge will see it as self defense."

I was in shock. "I didn't shoot him! He was protecting me. That's how we ended up here tonight."

I was hyperventilating and getting hysterical. The doctor stood between us.

"Maka please calm down." He turned to the officer. "I told you not to get her riled up. She has had a very traumatic evening. You have done enough damage tonight. I have to ask you to leave."

The wound on my head must have been agitated in my hysteria; I felt warm fluid trickle down my face. The physician shooed the policemen out of the room and shut the door. He looked at me with a compassionate expression as he started working on the cut.

"I believe you. I saw the two of you when you came in. That young man obviously cares about you very much. Someone that in love would never hit the object of their affection."

"Is he out of surgery yet?"

"As soon as I finish up here and get you admitted, I'll check on him."

I smiled at him gratefully. "Thank you."

When he finished stitching up my head wound, a nurse got me settled into a room. The bed was far from comfortable but I was exhausted. I fell asleep while silently praying that I wouldn't lose Soul.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Chapter 4 is finally here! Thank you for all the great feedback. You guys are fantastic! I know some of you will wonder what happened to Maka's family. All will be revealed in the next chapter. Also, let me know if the POV switching is confusing. I'm trying to make it as clear as possible who's doing the speaking. Anywho, thanks for reading! Don't forget to comment. You know you want to :)
> 
> ~Dawne-Sharlotte


	5. Chapter 5

 I was having trouble breathing. It felt like there was a ton of bricks sitting on my chest. I opened my eyes and saw nothing but darkness. I gradually became aware of the incessant beeping of the heart monitor next to my bed. A lady quietly came in a checked the monitor and my pulse before leaving as silently as she came. I drifted back to sleep, lulled by the infernal beeping.

* * *

The next time I opened my eyes, I was nearly blinded by the brightness. Once my sight adjusted to the light, I saw that I was in a hospital room. I looked around and saw a white-haired form. Crimson eyes, identical to mine, stared back at me.

"Welcome back to the land of the living, little brother."

"I wasn't aware that I ever left. What are you doing here, Wes?"

"Just because you left us doesn't mean we stopped caring about your well being. Plus, I missed your wit."

"Whatever. How did you even find out I was here? No one back home is listed as an emergency contact."

"Maka called me."

The previous night's events hit me with full force. I struggled to sit up. "Is Maka alright?"

"Calm down Soul. I checked on her before I came to your room. She's asleep."

I breathed a sigh of relief. As long as she was okay I could breathe easy.

* * *

"How did you manage to get shot?"

"I'd rather not talk about it."

"You are going to have to eventually. I heard some police officers talking in the waiting room. They believe Maka shot you."

I chuckled. "That's ridiculous. Maka is terrified of guns. I tried to teach her to shoot once and she completely flipped out."

"That may very well be, however, the police are saying that you abused Maka and she shot you in self defense."

"Interesting."

"Is that all you have to say about this?"

"For now, yes."

There was a silence for a while, a prickly silence. I hadn't seen n Wes in years. I had no idea what to say with him. I wasn't the social butterfly he was. Wes could charm the fuzz off a peach. He saved me from having to come up with something to say.

"Hey Soul, where is Maka's family? I mean, she's in the hospital. Someone should be here for her."

"She doesn't have any family. She was an only child and her parents died three years ago."

"What happened?"

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath as I prepared to recount the story.

"Maka and her parents were on their way to visit some friends. The roads iced over the day before, so there were still hidden patches of ice on the roads. I was talking to Maka on the phone; we were making plans to hang out when she came back. I heard the tires screech as they tried to find traction on the icy road. Maka screamed and the line went down. The car skidded off the road and hit a tree. Well, it wrapped around the tree. Her parents, who were in the front seats, died on impact and Maka, in the back, survived. She was in a coma for three weeks. I still hear her screams at night. It wakes me up in a cold sweat."

Wes shuddered a little. I knew the feeling.

"Well, she's seeing Blackstar, right? Where is he?"

I scowled. "Hopefully still unconscious. He's the reason we're here in the first place." Wes was about to question my statement. "Look, Maka and I agreed not to say anything until we figure out how she wants to spin this."

"I can't help you unless I know what happened."

"I didn't ask for your help. I'm following Maka's lead on this one."

"I want to help both of you. This will help get rid of some of the mounting debt I owe to Maka."

"What do you mean by that?"

"Maka keeps me updated on you so I have something to tell our parents. Don't be upset with her. She's just doing the favor I asked of her."

I should have known Maka would do something like that. Wes and I had an argument when he'd called a few months after I left. When she found out that I didn't get along with my family, she made it her personal mission to fix it. She never asked why we didn't get along. She said it didn't matter. She wanted help.

* * *

There was a knock at the door and the doctor came in.

"Mr. Evans, it looks like you are feeling better. We were able to retrieve the bullet. A few millimeters in either direction, or you might not have been with us."

"I guess luck was on my side."

"It seems that way."

"How is Maka?"

"Ah, the young lady that came in with you. She has three cracked ribs and a concussion. She was doing fairly well until about thirty minutes ago. She developed a brain bleed, due to the head trauma that she has sustained and was rushed into surgery."

I felt hollow. I couldn't breathe. I tried to sit up by a pair of hands pushed me back down on the bed.

"Wes, move. I have to get to her."

"There is nothing you can do for her right now."

I glanced at the doctor. "Is she going to make it?"

"It's hard to say at this point. It's very touch and go right now. Her history of head trauma complicates things."

The doctor left and I closed my eyes, trying to focus my breathing into a steady pace. Wes placed his hand on my shoulder.

"You love her don't you?"

"I've come close to losing her too many times. I think I would lose my sanity without her."

"Soul you have to tell me what happened."

I broke down and told Wes everything about how I got to this point. "I blamed Blackstar but really all of this my fault."

"No it's not. Were you wrong for kissing her? Absolutely. But he has no right to lay his hands on Maka. He should have talked to you about it. Blackstar clearly took the coward's way out."

* * *

The door flew open with a bang. Blackstar stood in the doorway.

"WHERE THE HELL IS MAKA?"

I can't say that I was all that surprised to see him. I just wished he hadn't figured out where we were so fast.

"She's in a place where you can't get to her."

His look of anger turned into one of despair. Despite whatever he did or said, he genuinely loved Maka. He just didn't know how to express his feelings in a healthy manner.

"Oh god. I shot her didn't I? I'll never be able to tell her I'm sorry or ask her forgiveness."

Blackstar fell to his knees with his head in his hands. I sat up and moved to get out of the bed.

"Wes, help me"

"Your stitches will open."

"Just help me."

With help from Wes, I knelt down in front of the blue-haired man. "I've become the person I hate the most. I'm just like my stepfather. He used to hit my mom when his anger would get the best of him." Blackstar's voice was barely louder than a whisper.

"Blackstar, you can still be better than him. Maka isn't dead. She's in surgery and she will pull through."

I helped Blackstar up and guided him to a nearby chair. Wes helped me back to the bed.

"Hey Soul, why are you in here?"

I shook my head at Blackstar's clueless-ness. "You shot me. It was an accident though. So no need to have another mental breakdown." "I'm sorry man."

"I'm not dead or anything."

Wes stood up "I'm going to get some coffee and see if I can get an update on Maka for you guys."

"And to call mom and dad."

"We were all worried about you, Soul."

* * *

Wes left and Blackstar shifted uncomfortably.

"Soul? Could you ever forgive me?"

"There's a lot of stuff we need to sort out, but I think we could be friends again."

"What about Maka? You think she will?"

"That'll be up to her."

The truth was that she probably would. Maka was a big fan of giving second chances. Blackstar was her best friend growing up and he was like a brother to her until they started dating. It would take a long time but Blackstar could eventually gain Maka's trust again, if she lived through all of this.


	6. Chapter 6

The only thing on my mind was Soul. All I could think about was the last twenty-four hours. Ever since I first laid eyes on him, when I saw the future, I always saw Soul next to me. When had I lost sight of that? I was never in love with Blackstar. In fact, I saw him as a brother. My parents thought we would be would be a cute couple when we were growing up. When they died, I saw dating Blackstar as fulfilling their last wish for my life. However, it was Soul that I saw whenever I closed my eyes. It was almost as if our souls were linked in some way, mine calling out for his. It astounded me how he was always there when I needed him, how jealous he was went I went to others for anything. I felt alive when I was near him.

It was never my intention to hurt Blackstar, nevertheless, I was cheating on him mentally and emotionally long before I kissed Soul. I felt terrible, but guilt faded away to physical pain. There was an unrelenting pressure in my head. I began to feel nauseous and my vision started to blur. All sound was muffled and the dull roar of blood in my ears wasn't helping. A few white blobs appeared in my room and I thought they were trying to say something, but I couldn't make out any words. My head felt like it was going to spontaneously combust. Darkness crept over my consciousness. I fought it as first, but when I noticed the relief it brought, I quickly succumbed

* * *

I awoke to the sounds of hushed voices around me. I slowly opened my eyes. There was a hand holding mine. I looked over into a pair of deep crimson eyes.

"How are you feeling?" His voice was like velvet on my skin. I wanted to answer him, but I couldn't remember how to speak. I started to panic.

"Shhhh Maka. It's okay. The doctor said something like this might happen. Do you know who I am?"

I closed my eyes. He looked familiar but I couldn't remember who he was or how I knew him. The way my heart fluttered told me that he was someone important, but I didn't know why. I suddenly realized that not only did I not remember the ruby eyed, white haired man; I couldn't remember who I was. He had called me Maka. Was that my name? I opened my eyes and shook my head. His shoulders slumped slightly and I could see that he was disappointed. A lone tear escaped his eye and I reached up to wipe it away. For some reason, it broke my heart to see him so sad. I was determined to remember him just so I could see him smile.

I glanced at the doorway and was shocked to find an imposing man standing there. It was like he was waiting for me to notice him. He didn't look frightening, but I was afraid anyway. My hold tightened on the man next to me. My heart stammered and my breath hitched as the stranger came into the room. I had no idea who this new person was; nevertheless, there was something about him that absolutely terrified me. The man next to me picked up on my fear.

"Blackstar give her a minute. She may not realize who you are yet."

"That's ridiculous Soul! We've been friends since we were five years old."

At least I knew their names now. The one named Soul was the one holding my hand. He was the one I felt safe around and I didn't want to be within a hundred feet of Blackstar. As Blackstar came nearer I cringed towards Soul.

"Maka! What's the matter? I'm your…"

"Do not shout Blackstar and don't finish that sentence. Can't you see that she is afraid of you?" Soul turned to me, "Do you remember Blackstar?"

I shook my head, hating that I couldn't communicate with my words. Soul, once again, sensed my frustration and handed me a pen and a pad of paper. I was so glad that I remembered how to write.

_How did I get here?_ The two guys exchanged a look.

"You and Soul were in a car accident." Something told me Blackstar was lying and the look on Soul's face confirmed my suspicions.

_What's the matter with me? Why can't I talk or remember anything?_ Soul squeezed my hand.

"You were hit in the head and developed a brain bleed. The doctors caught it pretty quickly, but there was still some damage to your brain. Your memory and speech could return at any time."

_Or I could never get them back._

Soul read the paper I handed him and gave me a slight nod.

"Don't worry Maka. I'll be there to help you every step of the way."

Blackstar tensed up. "Soul, can I talk to you a minute?"

He moved to leave and my grip constricted on him in panic. "It's okay, I'll be right back. Wes can you keep an eye on her?"

Another man that I hadn't noticed nodded and sat next to my bed. He was the spitting image of Soul, except he was older and taller. Soul wheeled his way out of the room followed by Blackstar. I looked at Wes and he smiled.

"I'm Soul's older brother, in case you were wondering." I glanced at the door.

Wes followed my gaze. "What's wrong?" I grabbed a sheet of paper and scribbled furiously.

_I don't trust Blackstar. He scares me. He wouldn't hurt Soul would he?_

Wes chuckled. "You don't have to worry about Soul. He can take care of himself?"

_Was Soul hurt badly in the accident? I saw he was in a wheel chair._

"The wheel chair is merely hospital policy. He will be fine. However, Maka, there was no car accident and if you want to know what really happened, I suggest you ask Soul."

Blackstar was up to something and it seemed like he had it out for Soul. I had to get my memory back to put a stop to Blackstar's plans.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I'm soooo sorry it took me so long to update. The plot bunnies were not churning out the inspiration. Thanks for all the love you have shown this story. Keep reviewing and I'll keep writing. Be sure to let me know what you think of this chapter. Looks like things are heating up again!


	7. Chapter 7

The doctor warned us that Maka might not remember some things, but I had not expected her to forget everything. It seemed that her speech was affected as well. I hated to see her suffer, especially when I couldn't help her. Maka's speech could definitely be recovered; however the odds of her memory returning were small. I still clung to hope that she would remember everything one day. Whenever I thought of her not remembering anything about the last few years, it broke my heart. I tried to keep a brave face for Maka, but my emotions insisted on getting the best of me.

When I saw the flashes of compassion and determination in her beautiful green eyes, I knew she was sill the Maka I fell in love with, regardless of the fact that she couldn't remember me. The way she clung to my hand, like I was her last bastion of safety, made me feel like the coolest guy on earth. For some reason she had complete trust in me.

* * *

The waves of anger that rolled off Blackstar were palpable to everyone in the room except Maka. She didn't even notice him at first. When she finally became aware of his presence, she was terrified. Of course Blackstar's loud and larger that life personality didn't help matters. Her fear of him only fueled Blackstar's anger and frustration. However, when it was realized that Maka did not remember him, his demeanor shifted. He lied to her about what actually happened and I had an educated guess as to why.

"Soul, can I talk to you a minute?"

Maka put my hand in a vice grip. She was genuinely afraid that something awful was going to happen if I left with Blackstar. I reassured her that I would return and left her with Wes.

"What the hell are you doing Soul?"

I sighed, "What are you talking about?"

"Stop trying to take Maka away from me!"

I raised an eyebrow. "She doesn't even know who you are, Blackstar. Any way you look at it, Maka does not belong to you. She broke up with you before she lost her memory and she's terrified of you now."

He leaned against the wall and folded his arms across his chest. "This is my chance to redeem myself. If she does not remember me, I can get her to fall in love with me again. I have a chance to do this right."

"Don't you think you have screwed her up enough? What's gonna happen when she gets her memory back and realizes you've been lying to her? You are already on the wrong track."

Blackstar smirked. "You know the chances of her memory returning are slim. Even if her speech comes back, her memory might never return."

I figured this was his plan, but I was still shocked to hear him say it.

"Maka is supposed to be your friend. Why are you trying to take advantage of her condition? Your problem is with me, not her."

"Look, all I know is that before the amnesia, Maka was leaving me. I can't lose her and this is my second chance to be the guy she deserves."

"What if this is my opportunity to be more than just a friend who patches her up when you decide to use her as your personal punching bag?" I got out of the wheelchair and stepped towards him with my best menacing glare. "You will not take her from me Blackstar."

I sat down in the wheelchair and went back into Maka's room.

* * *

After two weeks, both Maka and I received a clean bill of health; Maka's memory excepted, and were released from the hospital. Maka needed to stay with someone who could keep an eye on her. Her fear of Blackstar knocked him out of the running and she didn't remember Kid, the Thompson sisters, or Tsubaki. So, it was decided that she would stay with me. Tsubaki was a little disappointed, but understood. Kid, Liz, and Patty said that they would give her some time before they came to visit. Even Blackstar took the news surprisingly well.

Wes drove us to my apartment.

"Are you sure you don't need anything else?"

"You've done more than enough Wes."

My brother had taken the opportunity to have Maka's things moved into my apartment, stock the apartment with food, and had my motorcycle brought from the hospital. Wes left once we were settled in and promised he would be back later on in the week. Maka went to her room to unpack and I stretched out the couch as I flipped through the channels. I dozed off because I hadn't heard Maka enter the room. She gently poked me.

"Hey Soul, what do you want for dinner?"

I yawned. "It's fine. I'll do the cooking toni…. Maka! You spoke!"

She smiled at my shock and awe. "How long have you been able to talk?"

"Just now. I decided to give it a try and it just came back."

Her voice sounded heavenly. I must have missed it more than I thought. Maybe her memory would make a return appearance as well. We decided to make dinner together in celebration of this new milestone.

"Soul can I ask you a question?"

"Sure." I answered as I placed the food on the table.

"What really happened the night we ended up in the hospital?"

I froze with the fork halfway to my mouth. She obviously didn't buy the story Blackstar told her at the hospital. I couldn't decide if I should just tell her everything or wait until her memory came back. I also didn't know if she was mentally prepared for the truth.

"What makes you think Blackstar was lying?"

"Well, for starters, you don't own a car, just the motorcycle. If we'd been in any kind of accident involving a car, we'd both be dead most likely."

At least she still had enough brain power to do deductive reasoning. I realized she was not going to let me out of answering the question.

"Maka, you won't like what I tell you so are you absolutely sure that you want to know right now?"

That determined glint settled in her olive green eyes and she nodded. So I told her what she wanted to know while glossing over certain details. When her memory came back she would be able to fill in the holes. Maka listened to my story with an almost clinical detachment, her face blank and her eyes emotionless. When I finished, Maka quietly got up and went to her room. I had no clue what to do next. She needed time to process, so I cleared the table, washed the dished and headed to my bedroom.

I didn't know how Maka had taken all the information I'd given her and it made me anxious. I saw my keyboard collecting dust in the corner of my bedroom. I wiped the dust off and began to play. Hearing the twisted notes gave me the release I needed. It took me a minute to realize I was playing the song that I played for Maka when we first met.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I will say that writing the conversation between Soul and Blackstar was my absolute favorite part of this chapter. They are both so possessive...I love it!


	8. Chapter 8

My gut feelings now had reasoning behind them. I knew Soul had not told me everything which was fine. I would be able to fill in the holes when my memory returned. I plopped down on the bed with my legs hanging off the side and closed my eyes. My unease of Blackstar was justly founded. He was violent, jealous, and over possessive. According to Soul, Blackstar hadn't always been that way, but Soul didn't elaborate on what changed him.

Thoughts and theories bounced around in my mind until music broke through my thoughts. It was more like a twisted melody. The notes were dark and erratic, but it was still beautiful. There were waves of heartbreak, anxiety, fear, and anger swirling around in chaotic eddies of musical insanity. I lost myself in the sounds and feelings of the melody. The song began to tell its story.

* * *

_There was a girl walking down an empty hallway of what appeared to be a school. She was about to pass the music practice rooms when she heard the same melody. The girl didn't understand the meaning behind the music but she was drawn to it anyway. She gently opened the door to the room and saw a boy with hair that was as white as pure snow. He hadn't heard the girl enter and continued to play out his frustrations on the instrument. When the boy came to the end of the song, he heard the timid applause of someone behind them. The boy slowly turned around and met the most gorgeous peridot-colored eyes he had ever seen._

_"That was fantastic."_

_The girl clearly didn't have traditional taste in music. He ran his hand through his already unruly hair._

_"Uh, thanks. I'm Soul. I just transferred here."_

_"It's nice to meet you. My name is Maka."_

_"HEY MAKA! WHAT'S TAKING YOU SO LONG?"A loud, blue-haired boy burst into the room._

_"MAKA CHOP!"_

_"Dammit Maka! What was that for?"_

_"You are too loud. Forgive him. This is my friend Blackstar."_

_All of them smiled and agreed to meet up for lunch the next day._

The scene went black.

* * *

I came to as the music ceased. My heart was pounding. Was that how Soul and I met? Did that mean my memory was coming back? I excitedly followed the new melody to Soul's room and I softly knocked on the door.

"The first song you were playing, have you played it before?"

"Once. Why do you ask?"

"Was it when we first met?"

Soul's eyes widened fractionally. "Yes. How did you know that?"

"I saw it when I heard you play."

He smiled. "Who would have thought that music would trigger a memory for you?"

"I think it is just _your_ music, or rather, the emotions that underlie your music."

His grin turned into the sexiest smirk I'd ever seen and he used thumb to smooth out the thinking lines between my eyebrows.

"You don't need to think about it so hard, but I'm glad that you are beginning to feel the music."

His voice was incredibly soft but it had a deep timbre, which, along with his touch, sent shivers down my spine.

"I guess I had trouble with feeling the music before."

"Yeah something like that. I think not being able to understand that music was more than just a bunch of notes strung together is what frustrated you the most."

"Would you play for me, Soul?" he tucked a strand of hair behind my ear.

"Whatever you want Maka. You can have whatever you want from me."

* * *

The room was completely dark when I woke up. Soul had black energy saving curtains that blocked out sunlight. I hadn't meant to fall asleep in his room. Soul and I decided to play a game where he would play a song and I would try to guess the emotions that he was trying to convey. His last song was a lullaby. Before I fell asleep I felt that he was trying to show someone that he loved them through the song. I was probably wrong though, especially since I'd only gotten half of the songs right last night. Soul interrupted my thoughts when he poked his head in the room.

"Are you awake yet?"

"Yeah. What time is it?"

"Around noon."

I groaned. "Your bad habits are rubbing off on me."

He laughed a little. "Do you think you would be up to seeing a visitor today?"

"As long as it isn't Blackstar."

"It's not, so get dressed."

I got up, showered, and put on some denim shorts and a red tank top. I headed toward the living room.

"Good afternoon Maka."

A familiar looking girl with long, raven hair tied in a ponytail smiled at me. I recollected seeing her while I was in the hospital, but I couldn't remember who she was to me before the accident.

"Hi. It's Tsubaki right?"

She nodded. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm doing pretty well except for the memory thing."

"What about you Soul?"

"I'm fine."

"Are you changing your bandages like you are supposed to?"

"I'm fine Tsubaki."

She looked at me. "Soul is quite stubborn when it comes to his own health and well being."

"Do you normally keep tabs on him to make sure he doesn't kill himself?"

She gave me a small smile, "No. Normally you keep an eye on him."

The two of us talked while Soul flipped through the channels. After an hour, Tsubaki stood to leave. I noticed a charm in her hair.

"I remember when Liz convinced us to buy those hair charms. She said we were the only ones who could pull them off because we kept our hair in ponytails."

Tsubaki laughed. "They turned out to be a good investment."

She shot a knowing glance at Soul and left. I sat next to Soul on the couch.

"Do you know anything about my family, Soul?"

He turned off the television and sighed.

"Again with the tough questions. I don't know very much and you hardly mentioned them. I hate to say it, but Blackstar would be better able to answer that question than I. The two of you were friends long before I met you."

"Okay. Well…what about you and your family?"

"My family is irrelevant. I only talk to Wes and we don't talk on a regular basis."

I sighed. It looked like he wasn't going to tell me anything and it frustrated me. Although, I got the feeling that he wasn't being cryptic because he was hiding something. He just wasn't the type to talk about himself openly.

"So how often are you supposed to change your bandages?"

"Once a day."

"Soul, have you changed them at all?"

He was silent. I got up and searched his room for extra bandages. I grabbed his hand and drug him to the bathroom.

"Sit down and take your shirt off."

"Maka, I can take care of it."

"I don't doubt that you can, just that you will. Now take that shirt off."

He quietly complied and I stifled a gasp. Soul's chest was covered in scars.

* * *


	9. Chapter 9

I knew this would happen. It would have been fine if Tsubaki had just kept her mouth shut. Maka had the same reaction the first time she saw me without a shirt, except that time she's only caught a glimpse of my back. The view was the same though.

"What happened Soul?" she asked while she removed the old bandage.

"My life before I moved here wasn't as pleasant as it is now. I was in a gang and my job was weapons acquisitions."

Maka looked at me with wide eyes. "How did you end up in a gang?"

She put anti-bacterial ointment on the wound and placed a new dressing on it.

"I was sick of the incredibly privileged life that my family wanted me to lead so I kind of went looking for trouble. I did the typical juvenile crap: shoplifting, graffiti, and truancy. Before I realized it, the group of people I was hanging out with at the time convinced me to join their gang. It was a stupid thing to do and paid for my foolishness."

Maka ran her fingers over some of the scars. "Did you kill anyone?"

"No."

"How did you get this one?" She traced the scar that went diagonally from my shoulder to my hip.

"Protecting me."

Both of us followed the sound of Wes' voice to the doorway of the bathroom.

"Don't you ever knock?"

"I did, but no one answered. Are we taking a stroll down memory lane?"

"Not voluntarily."

Maka was undeterred from her line of questioning. "What was Soul protecting you from?"

"Soul was acting funnier than usual. I wanted to know what he was up to so I followed him one evening."

"I was supposed to meet a contact for a weapons shipment; a contact known for slashing first and asking questions later. Wes knocked over some crates. The noise spooked the guy and he charged at Wes."

"Soul took the hit. We almost lost him. Our parents were devastated."

I rolled my eyes.

"That is when I decided to leave. Wes proved that their curiosity would get me or themselves killed."

Maka was thoughtful for a minute. "Why don't you talk to your parents?"

"They will ask questions that I can't answer. It's better this way."

Wes snorted. "For you maybe. Mom and dad would rather you come back and take your place in the family. You are the favorite. You know they will forgive you for anything. Instead, you choose to stay here and slum it."

I stood up. "Now that you have given your unwelcome opinion, would you kindly explain why you are here?"

"I just came over to check on the two of you. I told you I was going to stop by."

"Well as you can see, we are fine."

Wes gave me a knowing look and glanced at Maka. "Clearly."

"It's not like that." He winked at me. "Not yet little brother."

I walked to the front door and opened it.

"Goodbye Wes."

He left and I shut the door behind him.

"How did he get in here?"

"I gave him a key a while ago." I smiled. Small memories were coming back and she didn't realize it.

Maka busied herself in the kitchen with dinner and I leaned against the counter next to her.

"Do you need help?"

"No. I believe I remember where everything is located."

She kept sneaking glances at me and I knew she wanted to ask me something.

"Say what's on your mind Maka."

"How many of those almost killed you?"

"Just the one. The rest are actually pretty shallow."

"Were they all knife wounds?"

"Knives are the weapons of choice. In a gang, everyone knows how to shoot a gun. The best way to test your skills is through a knife fight. Each hit is worth a point and the fight is over when someone is dead or incapacitated."

"So, most of those are from testing out your skills."

"Yeah. I never lost a fight."

Maka stopped what she was doing and lightly ran her fingers over my chest, her eyes full of emotion.

"Did you really place so little value on your own life?"

"Like I said before, I was foolish."

I gently took her hands and kissed the insides of her wrists. "I won't make that mistake a second time."

Maka's eyes glazed over, like she was seeing something that wasn't in front of her. "

Maka, what is it?" She blinked a few times before she registered my question.

"I remember what happened that night. I remember all of it."

* * *

I wasn't sure how I ended up here. The last place I wanted to be right now was at Kid's house with my brother, Blackstar, and Kid. I didn't have much of a choice in the matter either. Liz, Patty and Tsubaki ambushed my apartment saying that Maka needed girl time and kicked me out. Tsubaki was kind enough to let me know that I was supposed to go to Kid's house before shutting the door in my face. _My door!_ I really did not want to spend my afternoon catching up with the guys.

"Tsubaki mentioned that Maka's memory was returning."

I glared at Kid. I hadn't told Blackstar yet and I was hoping I wouldn't have to tell him for at least another week.

"Yeah."

Blackstar's widened to the size of dinner plates at my response.

"When did this happen? How much does she remember?"

"Chill out Star. It started the day she left the hospital. She remembers small things without realizing it. It usually takes something bigger to trigger a more important memory. For instance, I was playing a song and she remembered the day the three of us met."

"That's pretty cool."

"Maka remembered the night you put her in the hospital while she was making dinner last week too."

Wes snickered. "I guess you won't be able to lie your way back into her heart after all."

Blackstar stared daggers at him "Shut up Wes!"

The two of them had never gotten along and it didn't look like that was about to change. Kid looked to me to stop their bickering. I just shrugged my shoulders. I was not going to get involved in this one. If Kid wanted them to stop, he would have to do it himself.

"If Maka decides to take Blackstar back, that will be her decision. Fighting about it does not change that fact."

"Kid is right. Blackstar, Maka does have a few questions for you."

He looked at me suspiciously. "Questions about what?"

"Her parents. I haven't known her as long as you have. So, I told her that you would be the best person to answer her questions."

He grinned. "Tell her that I would be happy to answer he questions over dinner."

"Will do."

I carefully maintained my bored expression, although I really wanted to wipe that smug grin off his face. My phone buzzed and interrupted my thoughts. Apparently girl's day was over and I could return to the apartment.

"Well guys, I have to get going. Wes, are you coming for dinner tonight?"

"Not tonight."

"I'll let Maka know. Later."

* * *

On my walk home, I wondered how Blackstar would change his plan now that Maka wasn't completely clueless. He was resilient and persevering to a fault. If he wanted Maka, Blackstar wouldn't stop until he got her back. I knew that if I wanted a chance with Maka, I would have to step up my game.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you think Soul will do to step up his game? Do you think Maka will actually have dinner with Blackstar. Let me know your thoughts.


	10. Chapter 10

Why, oh why did I agree to this? Blackstar insisted that I have dinner with him alone. Since I couldn't bring Soul along with me, I insisted that we have dinner in a restaurant instead of at his apartment. In the event that he lost his temper there would be someone to call for help. I didn't realize how much I missed Soul until he wasn't around. His presence had a calming effect on my nerves. Focus Maka. While Blackstar chatted away, I was able to discern some things about his personality. For example, he got louder than usual when he got nervous. We started to draw angry stares from the patrons around us. But aside from that, I could see that Blackstar was caring guy and he had a big heart. I could see why we had been child friends and why we had dated. However, emotions were not something he was equipped to handle. He wasn't a vicious or mean person like I originally thought, but he was going to need some serious therapy work through his anger and emotional issues.

As I listened to him tell me about our respective families, I realized that my past life had been a cakewalk compared to his. Blackstar's home life had been an abusive one. His step dad was a habitual drinker and would take out his frustrations on Blackstar and his mother. His biggest fear was that he would become his stepfather. I had sympathy for him and his troubles but in my eyes he still couldn't be trusted. We couldn't be more than friends, at least not until I felt that he was no longer a threat to me. That and the fact that I was in love with Soul.

"Maka do you think you could forgive me for being an idiot?"

"Of course, but before you ask, I should tell you that we can't date. I just can't do it. It's a matter of trust."

Blackstar's eyes narrowed and his face turned into a sneer. "And you are the standard of trust?"

I was really glad that we were in a public place. I wasn't going to back down from Blackstar.

"If you are referring to the incident at the café, I accept your distrust. That doesn't change the fact that your actions were reprehensible. You should have talked to us."

"You remember that?"

"No, Soul told me what happened. He didn't tell me everything so when I do remember, my memory will fill in the gaps."

Blackstar slumped back in his chair. "Sneaky bastard. He's stepped up his game."

"This isn't a game or a competition."

I pushed my chair back from the table and Blackstar grabbed my wrist.

"Please don't leave." "We've discussed everything that we needed to discuss."

"Maka, I'm begging you to give me a second chance."

His mood changes were giving me whiplash, nevertheless, his expression made me feel like I was kicking a puppy. I needed to get out of here before my resolve crumbled.

"I do not doubt that you could redeem yourself Blackstar, but I would always be waiting for you to snap. We would end up repeating the same downward spiral. That would not be healthy for either of us."

"I'll prove to you that I can change."

Great, it really was going to become a competition between him and Soul. I was not only the judge, but the prize as well.

* * *

Soul was asleep on the couch with his feet propped up on the coffee table when I returned from dinner with Blackstar. I quietly shut the door and gently shook him. His eyes formed narrow slits.

"You're back already?"

"What do you mean? I was gone for three hours."

He yawned and stretched. "So how was it?"

"Very informative. I remembered some of the stuff Blackstar told me. Although, I felt like I was hearing most of it for the first time. He also wants me to take him back."

I felt, rather than saw, him stiffen. The expression on Soul's face was something between bored and aloof.

"It sounds like you have a lot to process and some decisions to make. I'm gonna call it a night. See you in the morning."

He was distancing himself from me in case I chose Blackstar. Soul stood up to go to his room but I grabbed the hem of his shirt as he walked past me.

"Don't pull away from me. You are the one person I've trusted since I woke up in that hospital room. If you leave now, I'll have nobody."

His eyes held such sadness. "I'm not leaving. I'm just giving you the space to make whatever decision you feel is best."

"And that's all you have to say?"

"What do you want me to say? Don't go back to him? It is your call."

"If you cared about me at all you would tell me how you feel."

"Maka, I do care. I'm just not good with words."

"Then show me."

His posture sagged as he pulled out of my grasp. "I can't. I refuse to make the same mistake again."

He went to his room and quietly shut the door. I sat there in stunned silence as tears ran silently down my face. I grabbed one of the couch pillows and held it to my chest. I lay on the couch and cried myself to sleep. Memories of the past began to play like movies on the big screen.

* * *

_Soul and I were in a café. I was waiting for Blackstar to arrive._

_"You look you are going to pass out. What's wrong?"_

_"I've been thinking about ending my relationship with Blackstar."_

_Soul's eyes widened. "Why? I thought things were great between the two of you."_

_I stared into my coffee to avoid meeting his eyes._

_"They are. It's just that my heart isn't in it. I think I may have feelings for someone else and it is not fair to him to keep pretending like this."_

_"Who is this other person?"_

_I was positive that my face was tomato red but I needed to know if he felt the same way about me. Now that the opportunity was here, I wasn't about to let it pass me by._

_"It's you Soul." He didn't say a word for what seemed like ages. "You know let's pretend I didn't say anything."_

_"Why?"_

_"Because you obviously don't feel the same and the silence is kind of awkward."_

_"Why would you say that?" "If you felt that way, you would tell me."_

_He ran his fingers through his hair. "It's not that I don't have feelings for you, I just don't know how to say it."_

_"Then show me." Soul gently pressed his lips to mine and set my senses to overload._

* * *

I was glad that I had finally filled in the gaps of that memory. I understood what Soul was talking about. He loved me. He always had. He believed that everything that stemmed from that kiss was his fault. Soul's guilt threatened to tear us apart.

* * *


	11. Chapter 11

I was torn. I wanted to be with Maka, but I didn't want anything to happen like before. Blackstar might have been terrible with emotions and feelings but he had beaten me to the punch once again. I hadn't expected him to try and get her back so soon. I thought I had more time. We were repeating events and conversations. Maybe life was giving all of us a second chance. We definitely screwed up the first time around.

The walls of the apartment were thin and I could hear Maka crying in the other room. I plugged my headphones into my keyboard and turned it on. Taking my frustrations out on the black and white keys, I lost myself in the dark tune. No matter how hard I tried, Maka continued to dominate my thoughts. I was so preoccupied with the music and my thoughts that I didn't hear her come into my room. She tapped me on the shoulder. I glanced at her. Her eyes were red and a little puffy. I removed my headphones while not quite meeting her eyes.

"Why do you blame yourself for all of the terrible things that have happened, Soul?"

"None of it would have happened if I had kept my feelings to myself."

Maka sat on the edge of my bed as she picked at her finger nails, a nervous habit of hers. "You keep forgetting that I fell for you too. That kiss wouldn't have occurred if I hadn't been willing to let it. You didn't force yourself on me. I made my choice and I chose you."

I sighed and ran my hands through my hair. "It's not only your choice."

She gave me a puzzled expression.

"I want to be with you, but I can't."

"Why not? Blackstar will get over it."

"It's not just about Blackstar. You don't just walk away from a gang. There is no leave of absence. They're probably still looking for me and it's by sheer luck that they haven't found me yet. I don't want you involved in any problems that I've caused. Blackstar's rampage just proves my point. You got hurt because of something I did."

Maka shot off my bed, her face tinged scarlet in anger. "None of this is your fault! You can't just put your life on hold because something bad might happen! Do you love me or not?"

I sat back in my chair and stuffed my hands in my pants pockets. "My love for you was never in question. The problem is that I can't always be there to protect you, and let's face it; you are a magnet for trouble. I hate seeing you beaten and broken. All I remember thinking while you were in the hospital was that as long as you were alive and well, it didn't matter if you never remembered who I was."

She moved towards me and brushed the hair out of my eyes. "Is my safety your only objection to our relationship?"

"Yes."

"Then teach my how to protect myself."

I smirked. "Fine, but we will do this my way. No objections."

* * *

It took the entire six months we had been dating to get Maka used to the idea of using a gun. I got her a .38 special and took her to the firing range three times a week. For the first month, she wouldn't even pick up the gun. She eventually stopped resisting when I taught her some self defense moves and explained that pepper spray would just anger her attacker. Once she realized that I saw the gun as a last resort in her protection, she was much easier to work with. By the time we'd been together six months, she was hitting eighty percent of her targets and carrying it with her on a daily basis.

Everything was going well, even Blackstar was behaving. Well, at least when Maka was around. When it was just the guys, his animosity towards me would seep through. The night before my six month anniversary was designated as a guy's night. Wes, Blackstar, and Kid came to my place for drinks. Of course, the topic of conversation turned to the girls.

"So Kid, have you decided between Liz and Patty yet?" I asked.

"I'm still weighing my options, but I'm leaning towards Liz."

The conversation went on for a while as we discussed the pros and cons of both girls. Everyone was getting along pretty well until my brother had to ruin everything.

"What are you and Maka doing to celebrate?" Blackstar tensed and Kid visibly looked uncomfortable.

"She has something planned for this weekend."

"Letting the woman plan everything. You were clearly the better choice." Blackstar growled as he downed his shot and smashed the glass on the table. Luckily, it didn't break.

"Now now, Blackstar. This is the kind of behavior that caused Maka to leave you in the first place."

"Shut up Wes. You don't know anything about my relationship with Maka."

He chuckled as he took a sip of scotch. "You don't have a relationship with Maka. As a matter of fact, you barely have a friendship with her."

I decided to step in before Blackstar trashed my apartment trying to kill Wes. "How about we drop this topic?"

"No. Since everyone thinks you are the better choice, tell me how you plan to protect Maka from Gage?"

Just hearing the name made me want to run, but I wasn't about to show fear in front of Blackstar. "I haven't seen Gage in years. I doubt that he even knows where I am."

"Who is Gage?" Kid inquired.

"The leader of the gang that Soul belongs to." The expression on Blackstar's face showed just how much sick pleasure he was getting from this. "You know you don't just walk away, Soul. The only way Gage would let you go is if you were dead."

"And yet I am still here."

"For how long?"

As long as I kept a brave face, Blackstar would achieve nothing. Besides, I already knew what he was saying. It was only a matter of time until Gage tracked me down and I would gladly die to keep Maka safe, I was just hoping I wouldn't have to.

* * *

My vibrating cell phone woke me up later that night. I glanced at the clock and inwardly groaned.

_Who the hell would be calling me at five in the morning?_

I disentangled myself from Maka's limbs and answered the phone as I left the room.

"This is Soul."

"Eater, it is so good to hear your voice again. It seems like it's been ages." My entire body froze. "Do you remember me, Soul? We used to be such good friends."

"What do you want Gage?" I was surprised my voice sounded so steady.

"That's no way to talk to a friend that has been worried about your well being."

"Last time I checked we weren't friends and you were trying to kill me. How did you get this number anyway?"

"Your buddy, Blackstar, was kind enough to inform me of your whereabouts." I can't say I was astounded to hear that, but it still pissed me off.

"What do you want, Gage?"

"I want you to come back."

I scoffed. "And what if I say no?"

He snickered. "Your adorable girlfriend will pay the price for your unwillingness."

My heart stopped. This was my nightmare stepping into reality.

"I'll take your silence as a yes. Meet me in the old boating warehouse at the edge of the city at three o'clock in the morning. I look forward to seeing you again."

The line went dead and I stood rooted to the floor. Maka was in danger because of me again. Only this time, I would end it once and for all and take that dirty, double crossing bastard, Blackstar, down as well

* * *


	12. Chapter 12

One of the disadvantages of being a light sleeper is that I can instantly tell when Soul gets up. Usually he's only gone for a few minutes and then he comes back and tosses and turns all night. This time he'd been gone an hour and still hadn't returned. I got out of bed and quietly opened the bedroom door. The whole apartment was eerily silent. I walked down the hallway to living room. The only light in the room came from the window. Soul was standing in front of it; the blinds painting horizontal stripes across his upper body. His numerous scars sharply contrasted against his tanned skin. He had an otherworldly look about him.

"If you don't get any sleep, you are going to be too tired to enjoy all of the fun stuff I have planned tomorrow." I said as I sauntered up behind and wrapped my arms around him.

His chest rumbled with laughter. "I'll be ready for whatever you throw at me."

Something was wrong. I could feel the uneasiness radiating off of Soul and depositing in the pit of my stomach. "You haven't asked what kind of torture I have planned for you."

He turned to face me, my arms still encased around his toned frame. "I was hoping it would at least be enjoyable. After all, it's my anniversary too."

His face was shrouded in darkness, so I couldn't see what I knew to be his half-hearted attempt at a smirk. Something was off. Soul was tense. It seemed as if he was trying to hold himself together.

"What's the matter?"

He put his arms around me. "Why do you ask?"

"I don't know. Just a feeling."

He chuckled. "You and your feelings certainly keep me on my toes. I'm mostly worried about this torture you have planned for me later."

He was pointedly evading my questions so I let it drop and smiled. "Let's just say that my torture includes that new bookstore around the corner."

"Not that three story monstrosity!" He gasped in mock horror. I could feel the deep timbre of his laughter. "Whatever you want Maka."

I smirked. "Then we should get to bed. You'll have a lot of books to carry tomorrow."

* * *

I woke up later to find Soul's side of the bed empty for the second time in five hours. I sighed. This was starting to get old. I kicked the covers back, got out of bed and stretched.

"Good morning sleepyhead." I nearly jumped out of my skin. "Soul! You scared me half to death!" He was wearing that trademark smirk that made me weak in the knees.

"Sorry. Breakfast is ready. We have a lot of shopping to get through."

I laughed a little. "Don't worry. I have fun stuff planned for you too."

He raised an eyebrow. "Really? I expected to be catering to you for the duration of the day."

* * *

After breakfast, we went to my favorite bookstore. Then we stopped by a game shop that Soul liked to visit. He was surprised that I'd pre-ordered the game he'd been talking about for months. He bought me a pair of sparkly hair ties that I had my eye on. He checked his watch and steered me in the direction of the park in the center of DeathCity.

"What are you up to?"

He stopped me and pulled a green handkerchief out of his pocket. "Tie this around your eyes."

"Why?"

"Because you will ruin everything if you see it before I'm ready for you to see it." I started looking around to see what he was talking about. "You aren't going to see it right now so just put the blindfold on."

"Fine." I pouted.

I hated to concede defeat, but Soul was more stubborn than I was and my curiosity would get the best of me in the end if I didn't let him have his way. I put the blindfold on and let Soul lead me by the hand. I tried to pick up on stray sounds that might give me a clue as to where we were going. Unfortunately, I couldn't.

Finally, we stopped and Soul removed the fabric. After my eyes adjusted, I was in awe at the sight in front of me. There were hanging paper lanterns covered in colored glass in several of the trees. The shards of glass caught the rays of the setting sun and painted the clearing in rich shades of blue, green, red and purple. In the center of the clearing, a blanket covered the ground.

"I made lasagna. I know it's your favorite."

"When did you have time to do all of this?"

Soul shrugged and stuffed his hands in his pockets. "I do some of my best work during my bouts of insomnia. You sleep so hard a train could go through the apartment and you would never know."

I rolled my eyes. "Leave it to you to destroy the moment by exaggerating. I am a light sleeper, for your information."

"No, you think you are a light sleeper. The three times that you've been awake when I have gotten up don't count." He gave me a lopsided grin. "Don't get all huffy because you know it's true."

"Stop picking on me or I'll beat you to the lasagna."

* * *

The whole day was incredible. I couldn't remember Blackstar and I ever having this much fun. It was easy to be myself with Soul, like it was natural.

"What's with the goofy smile?"

Soul snapped me out of my reverie. "Maybe I'm just happy."

"Don't get all mushy on me Maka. It doesn't suit you."

"What you meant is that it embarrasses you." I gave him a quick peck on the lips.

"Mushy isn't cool."

"I thought you were past all that cool or uncool nonsense." I laughed.

"You never get over being cool." He lay on the blanket with his hands behind his head, eyes closed.

"Soul?"

"Hmmm?"

"Do you think the worst is behind us?"

He cracked one eye open. "Would it change anything?" I must have looked confused. He sighed and propped himself up on his elbows. "Would it change this moment? Would it change your feelings?"

"No."

"Then my answer would make no difference in the grand scheme of things."

He was being cryptic. It was an odd behavior for him, like there was something he didn't want me to know. My silence clearly spoke volumes. He sat up and took my hands in his. "Maka, I believe we can survive anything. It doesn't matter if the worst is behind us or just on the horizon." His eyes told of his sincerity so I didn't push the matter any further.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I know that the characters are kind of OOC but for the purpose of the story, these are their personalities. To all the Blackstar fans out there, I'm sorry that he's kind of a jerk right now. It'll straighten itself out. Remember, reading is great and reviews are love!


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